fears for the future.

          The final full week of learning in Family160. This week we are learning a lot about marriage. We talked about divorce and the rates of divorce as it increases and stabilizes over time. I dont really know how i feel about divorce. i think it is so sad. to think you found the person that you want to be with for the rest of your life only to find out you were wrong and have to make the decision to live on your own again. Its so sad. But i think that there are times when it is okay to end things. The Prophet does say that if two people are living the gospel and making good choices, it doesn't matter who the person is, you can have a good and successful marriage. But when one person is not doing what they should, and not following the commandments, i cant help but think it would be better to end it, then to let them drag you down. But that being said i know that people take marriage way too lightly. i mean look at all the marriages that take about 3 months for courtship and even less time to realize they didn't want to be married anymore. People forget the importance of courtship and just get swept away in the idea of it. they are forgetting the important task courtship does. it helps you find out if the person is the RIGHT one. the one that meets all the requirements that you want in a future spouse. BYUI is full of people dying to get married, and this can lead to a lot of issues in the future.
            But its not just mormons. people are getting way to wedding happy. and i think it is because they know that there is a way out. divorce is so easily assessed so they feel like its not such a huge commitment.
         
           Then we talked about the idea of blending families. getting married after a divorce when you have kids and stuff. Brother Williams is a part of a blended family. He married a divorce wife (adorable by the way- she came into class to answer questions) with two kids so he had a lot of insight about our questions. Its amazing how different the structure of a family changes as families blend together. But the idea of "blending" is a wonderful thing to me. to mix families together so much to where the separate parts cant be pulled apart. Brother williams said that it takes 2 years for families to get back to normalcy. and that the step parent should be more like an uncle and the birth parent should be more like the disciplinary system. I have so many friends who are a part of divorced parents and have blended families and also friends whose divorced parents have not met another to remarry. and i think that remarrying is good for the kids and the parent as long as the step parent is the right one. as a family structure it is so important to have two parents and it eases the tension of responsibility on the older children.
The structure of a family is so sensitive and every factor plays into the overall feeling and working system of the family. i cant imagine what it would be like to live with a family other then the always same family that i have now.
     It worries me to know that the decisions of who i date will decide the structure of my family in the future. i want to make sure that i take my time when i meet my future husband and that we dont rush into things but go into the marriage for life. not till divorce is the choice or till we get tired of each other. but forever. Because if i have learned anything from these lessons, it is that divorce is messy. and blending families is stressful hard and sometimes messy. I want to make it simple. I fear it will be hard, but i know that if i have the Lord, any decision i make will be in my best interest and everything will happen for a reason. dont rush, just breath and trust myself. and the lord.

and the kitchen timer is up.

So this week we learned a lot of great stuff.
But i really feel like the most important thing was what we talked about on Wednesday.
We were talking about when it was right to have children and when it was right to wait.
I must admit i was only partially listening to the lesson because my mind was somewhere else stressing about finals and all the things i needed to be doing, so i wasn't really doing that well of a job.. but then i over heard something that really bugged me.

They were talking about how you shouldn't wait to have kids. i was thinking in my head.. "who the heck's business is it to say when you should have kids or not?!" people in the class were saying dont wait because thats what we were sent down here to do. procreate. Thats why we are married is to raise children. And listening to this just frustrated me so much.

There is no need to rush things. being up here at BYUI there is so much pressure to do everything so fast. So much pressure to move to the next stage of life and the next one right after that. Its scary and a little annoying. Before we can add someone else into our lives, like a husband or a wife, we have to live a life that prepares us to be a good spouse. Go through experiences that make us into worthy temple recommend holders, that makes us strong enough to withstand the trials that arise through mariage and the responsibilities of growing up. YOU have to grow up. so that is why you need to wait to get married until you are ready. not when other people are ready or when they say you should be ready, but when you feel it in your heart that you are enough of a self driven person, that you can add someone into your life and not lose yourself.

the same goes for having a baby. it is such a huge responsibility raising a child. because it is not your own. it is heavenly fathers. and he is placing his trust in you to raise the child right. to care for him or her. to teach him or her and to love him or her whenever they need it. And to do all of this, you must be in the right place in your life to provide it all. You cant be so swamped in college that you wont be able to finish your degree or you wont be able to watch your child all the time. you cant be working from morning to night to make rent and stress about who is going to watch the kid all the time. You cant be in the middle of deciding where you are going to live and what you are going to do with your life and then decide to add another life onto that. Its unhealthy. become stable. become responsible. become ready. its just like food. you cant take it out just because you are hungry right then. its still not going to be ready. sure you can put it in the microwave, maybe be willing to eat it a little raw or a little cold. but whats the good in that? wait late.. its burned or soggy while sitting out. either way, its not good to wait too long or take it out too early. You gotta set the timer for perfection and wait it out. let it cook to the perfect temperature so that when you cut it open, it seeps steam and the smell is so good it makes your mouth water. and eating it is the best thing ever. thats what parenthood should be like. the best thing ever.
So its okay to wait. Not forever, because then that would be a mistake. dont put it off for selfish reasons or just because. Put it off only if you know and you know your heavenly father knows, that you are doing it so that when you can have a child, you can be the best parent you can be. to raise the child the best way you know how and in the way your heavenly father wants you to.
so to all those people that pressure you to have kids. i say stop listening. because in the end, when they are crying and wondering what went wrong, you can sit back and know that you made the right decision for you.

An Eye of Gratitude

This week was Thanksgiving weekend. It was honestly such a wonderful weekend. so great to come home and be with with the family. Being away from them for so long make me really appreciate all that my parents do for me.
this class is all about families and the family structure and i cant tell you how much i look at my family differently. Like every bond that we have, every communication skill that we have, all the ways we show affection and the things we do with others in our family makes me realize the reasons why we do things and how my family seemingly perfectly common, is in fact completely different from any others.
I think that because i had to write a paper on the value of fatherhood in the family, i was observing my dad a little more then usual. It was remarkable the love i acquired for him the more i looked at what he did for me and my family. Fatherhood is honestly such an important part of the family system. Its so wonderful to watch my dad support us financially and put so much pressure on himself to make us feel the security that money, home, and material things can bring to us. He gives his whole day over and over again to do whatever he has to do to make us happy and able to live the lifestyle we love. He is so selfless that it takes my breath away. And then to have him come home, help mom with household things, and then still have time to show his love for my siblings and me is the best feeling ever.
I love when i can go up to my dad and have him rub my back or my hair as i lay on his lap and watch tv with him. making him laugh is one of my favorite things. He is so funny and so understanding and easy going. I just love him so much and this paper and this weekend really made me realize it.
i am so blessed to have the father that i do. to have the mother that i do. I know that if i had anyone different, i would not be the person who i am today.
Thanksgiving is a time to be grateful. A lot of time i look at the things my life lacks. but i want to start looking at my life with an eye of Gratitude. To look at all the things that i have to be grateful for. the life and the family that my parents have made for me. and have given their whole life to create for me.
I love them so much and i love my siblings and i feel blessed this holiday to be privileged enough to feel that love.
This was a good thanksgiving. obviously. i have a lot to be thankful for.

Super Powers

This week we talked a lot about the power that can arise in a relationship. Monday we talked about communication and the power that we can have if we talk to each other. I usually dont have a problem with talking... but i do think that i have trouble expressing my feelings in a way that allows others to feel like they can voice their own opinions. i know that to make a relationship work, there has to be communication. But that doesn't just mean talking. i think it also takes a lot of listening. Listen to the way your partner says things. Their tone, their body language, and the words that they say. I can't wait till i have a relationship where i can understand what they are saying without him saying it. But the thing is, i guess i would want a relationship where i didn't have to find the underlying words, but instead, i would want him to tell me. to not fear me getting mad or hurting my feelings, but to be able to have a open and honest relationship.

Communicate so clearly so that we can not be misunderstood.

I am a very sarcastic person and sometimes i can come off mean and hurtful while all the while i am only making jokes. I really want to work on being better at using my words for kindness and really trying to be better at making sure that i am not misunderstood or my words aren't taken the wrong way. I want my words to demonstrate my thoughts and feelings. Relationships need communication. but it has to be the right communication to create the power to overcome the world and create a healthy relationship.

On wednesday, we talked about direct power of a certain party in the relationship and how we use that power. A lot of time, we rely on the other person for a lot of things. we want to make them happy and yet we need things from them. so we do things that they want. and we want them to do things for us. But how we use that power is how successful it will be. When we need things, it cant be things that are about "me". We should do things and want things that will benefit both parties in the relationship. Its what we want and how we approach the situation that will make it a success or not. Its not about criticizing or demanding, it should be brought about with love and kindess and then they will better respond and react to what you want. The scriptures says to speak with sharpness however thats not to jab and hurt but to use precise and direct words so as to keep confusion about what you are asking. We should also only mention things when the spirit prompts us to do so. that way we will know if it is beneficial to the relationship in order to create a celestial marriage.

Friday we talked about creating the power by combining our skills and ideas. communicating and combining knowledge will help us reach our highest potential. create a consensus on things to create the best answer between the two of you. But also include the Lord with your communication and what you should do through prayer and expressions of love. Communicate about things gives you additional information that you couldn't get from one mind or one heart. Both hearts are necessary to reach the correct answer. We become vulnerable, but by doing this, it unifies your spirits and gives you more power then any other skill.

Relationships are hard, but with communication, the right communication, we can reach a power that can overcome any obstacle. with faith and trust in the lord and love for your partner, anything is possible.

Trials Make Us Stronger

Crisis is defined as an event that will lead to or most likely force us to change. 

It expresses the idea that our old ways of coping just isnt going to work anymore. 

For the most part, i use to always think of a crisis as a terrible thing. as something that should be afraid of and scared to encounter. Its funny because when i think about, trials have only ever made me stronger. but i still hate them. i guess that is because when you are going through the trial, it is terrible and hard and not fun. but in the end, maybe way far in the end, it turns out okay. The Lord always says that he wont give us anything that we cant handle, but it is still scary to be pushed to our limits. 

Families experience a lot of trials throughout their development. How could they not? and no family is protected from this struggle nor should they be. because the truth is, crisis' are good for the family. going through the trial is a way for the family to build off of it. they adjust and make their family stronger and better and more efficient to handle the situation and other situations like it. I am not saying it will work every time, but for the most part we learn to change. there are many different theories and models to prove this point. dr. stresser, the roller coaster model, and the ABC models demonstrate the up and down movement of families and how in the end, it is up to the families and what they are willing to do, to decide the outcome of the struggles. 

Its important to be strong and instead of falling apart, they should bound together, rely on each other and make each other survive. We need to prepare the relationships ahead of time in order to withstand the difficult situations

I know that for me, i have seen many families experience a lot of pain such as a death of a family member, and they became better people because of it. stronger more worthy LDS and just better people all around.

The story about Brother Williams family was heartbreaking. there was not a sound in the classroom as he was teaching it. But he was also so inspiring. so strong and he was able to see the good and be grateful for the trial that took his brother away because he could see how much better his family is because of how they worked through such a difficult time. 

Its important to have resilience. we must fight against the pressure and bounce back much like a ball does due to the pressure. We experience many risk factors, something that makes crisis' happen more likely, and it is also important to avoid these things or think about if the activity is worth the risk or not. 

but luckily we have many protective factors that will help us overcome these difficult times and things that we can do to protect us from needing to face these things. I am so grateful for the gospel and for the strength it brings to my family. I will never wish for a crisis' or hope that we go through tough situations. but i know that if i do ever have to face one, i will be prepared and i will become stronger because of it and not crumble under the pressure. 

Mid term exam time

So this week we only had one class because our teacher went on a conference thing. so that was good! haha we got two days off! it stinks though because this class is in the middle of my other classes so i was going to have to be on campus anyways. but still i got to catch up on hw. and i got 100% on my test. so last week was good.

the test was all about the idea of same sex marriage and how to communicate with a person who does nto share the same beliefs as you. i think that living in california, i have learned to just keep my mouth shut. its better not to say anything then to fear offending someone. i mean lets face it, california is full of them. one wrong opinion and you will most likely offend them or their family or their friend or their neighbor or anyone else. its too hard. so therefore i dont say anything. But as i was taking the test, i couldn't help feeling dumb and chicken. why wouldn't i just say what i believe? there are so many ways to say it politely and with a tone that does not hurt the feelings of the other person. I should be confident enough and educated enough to be able to describe what i feel and why i feel that way.
so i am going to try and do better at that this week. im giving myself my own little assignment. ya know? my own little mid term test.
I think its kind of like sharing the gospel. everyone is free to believe what they want and many of times, they will not agree with what i have to say, but lets face it, if i dont share it, does that mean i am ashamed?? i dont know. but what i do know is that it sis essential to share what i believe and i hav learned that when you do, you become more aware of how you feel and more confident in what you believe in.
Having the holy ghost to help me should make me confident as well because the Lord will propt me what to say.

On monday we talked about marital sex. but im so childish about this stuff. i really dont do well with it. i guess that is why i am not married or even close to being married. lets face it. im not mature enough.
but thats fine. I will wait. but i know that when i do wait, it will be a wonderful and bonding experience and will make my relationship with my husband stronger. i cant wait to have that love and share the love and my whole self with the one person that will be mine for the rest of my life.. I guess waiting is another one of my tests. ugh mid terms

Expectations.

Ya know what... i dont really know how i feel about all this stuff. I like the idea of everything just coming together perfectly and blissfully and love being the thing that makes everything okay and when you find the right one, nothing else matters. but this class is just showing me that even after you find the one.. the problems never end. actually just the opposite. it gets worse! i mean i dont know. its weird. everything is so complex. so many different ways to love someone... so many different relationships that are necessary for a good and successful family.

and its so stressful too! dating is not just dating. I mean the way you date decides everything. The communication you have with your boyfriend now, affects the relationship of your eternal marriage! i mean come on! stressful. right?

I do like the idea of taking the big steps in a relationship and making sure that they are defined and clear. I was talking to my boyfriends brother and he said that there is no need to have a clear talk about being boyfriend and girlfriend or not. He said that it just happens. its a flow... a feeling. But this class made me realize that that is stupid. If he is too lazy or too unthoughtful to take the time to step out of the comfort zone and ask the simple question or make the questions answered, then he obviously doesnt understand the importance of being in a good relationship.

I loved wednesdays lesson and how we talked about the processes we should take while engaged. soooo many girls are obsessed with finding their perfect wedding. Pinterest is a disaster because all girls do is post all day about what they want. but think about it.. if your online picking your wedding dress.. when do you have time to find the guy to ask you to wear that wedding dress... its so silly. we should be focused more on how to make ourselves better and more on finding the right marriage instead of the right wedding.

Brother Williams says that we need to learn to rely on each other and become one, we need to be able to establish good problem solving skills, and making decisions together.
We made a list of what we want in a marriage and that we need to find a guy that we can talk about what we want with them so we know if they will make a good spouse.
What was scary to learn is what happens when we want kids. how drastically it changes the relationship and dynamics of the relationship. Its so simple yet so stressful. keep the bond strong with the spouse while still opening that bound to bring in the children.

The family system will always be changing i guess.. and the only thing we can do is adjust.
Moms need to open up the job of motherhood to let the dad help out as well.
communication and quality time is important.
Dont let go of the litte things like opening doors or appreciating the little things that our spouses do.
dont get too tired or too busy to make sure we are nurturing our relationship.

I want to find someone that i never get tired of building the relationship. I know i will have to work at it, but i want it to be enjoyable work. work that makes me smile and happy. I want to be a couple that gets stronger. no matter what gets thrown our way. Thats what i expect.

The Dating Game

      This week was all about dating! and i loved it! it is so interesting to learn about something that is so prominent in all our lives. we talked about how many people we should date before we find our spouse and i learned that we are supposed to date at least 20 PEOPLE!!! isnt that crazy!!??? man. i have a lot of work to do. but i think that that totally makes sense. because think about it... you date to find out what you like in people and what you dont like. what works best for you and what you could do without. so why would you stop and fall short of learning. i mean. why would i only visit 3 states and then be forced to say that one of those states was my favorite out of all 50 states??  that doesnt make any sense. but i mean you dont have to see all the different states. because you can lump some together. like coastal states and country ones. cold and hot ones. so you do have to try out a little of each. its the same with boys. or if your a boy girls. so i really have to start on that.

      there are 4 things that bring people together.
1. they obviously must live close to each other. but that makes sense. because you have to meet each other right? where you live decides what you do, if you will run into each other, and whether or not you have things in common. but it is true that distance is having less of an impact now because of technology. i mean think about it, we can text and facetime, skype and call. its like we never left each other.
2. Attraction. but this is obvious too. i mean you wont be interested in someone unless you think they are physically attractive.You have to have that physical love for the person if it is ever going to work. and that doesnt mean that it has to be love at first sight. but the love or physical attraction can grow over time. but it does have to be there.
3. Similarities. sometimes it is common for people to be attracted to people that look like them or that look like people from their own family. there also has to be similarities in your belief system morals and the way you live. some things can be different because opposites do attract. but there has to be some common ground so you can coexist without so much fighting and constant battles.
4. Behavior. the behavior that we have now, will only become stronger and grow. so we look to make sure that our behaviors blend together well.
also finding the right behavior of guys now is important. not everyone will change. sometimes what they are now, will only increase with time. Girls like the thought of changing the bad boy but that is not always the case. we dont get so lucky most of the time.

The thing that i loved most that i learned this week is that how the boy dates us will tell you the type of man he is going to be.
if he takes you on dates, pays, takes the time to take you one on one and prepare something special for you, then you know he will be a good man that will provide protect and preside over your household and your family. It totally makes sense. i mean my ex boyfriend and i never really went on dates. we "hung out" together and just did things with our friends. i never realized it but he never put forth the effort to make me feel special or show that he takes the time to think about me. needless to say it didnt last haha. and i am not saying he was a bad guy.. he just isnt the guy that will be a good provider for me and my family. Its weird. I am learning so much more now and i am realizing how serious dating should be. How we need to listen to our leaders when they tell us to date around. how serious it is to find the right guy for you. and not just the hot one or the nice one. but the one that is going ot raise your family and take care of you and provide for your family. preside over it and fill your home with the priesthood.
I have learned so much from my own dating and from our class.

Its not enough to HEAR it. you have to SEE it.

i cant wait till i finally see it.

Hopeless Romantic

So this week has been pretty weird. Naturally me being a girl, i deal with boy drama probably every day of my life. Being at BYU actually being in idaho.. constantly puts a weird vibe on everyone. i feel it so much this year. its the vibe of needing to be married. of needing to have someone thats a partner to let the world know "hey look! im not weird! someone likes me!" its funny. before, i never really thought about it. ya know i just assumed ehh i will deal with it later. i will meet my soul mate in college. but lets face it, im here in my second year. im 20 and i still have yet to meet someone even remotely close to my list of things i want. so to say im stressing is an understatement. but then i had a lesson. Both in this class and in my religion class and it could not have been at a better time!
     
       First we learned about the differences between girls and boy. How differently boys learn and think and feel and deal with things. we talked about how boys have the ability to focus on one thing and forget about the rest and how girls have a knack for thinking a little too much. This usual would make me so frusterated because why cant boys just think like girls or girls like guys. i mean that would make it so much easier. we would all be able to understand each other and it would all be sunshine and butterflies. But then the class talked about how perfect being different is. How we need the other to balance our lives. Heavenly Father made us that way so that life is easier when your with your loved one. Knowing this gives me hope. that my opposite, perfect match, is out there. wondering what the heck girls are thinking just like i am wondering what boys are thinking.

        This translates to how we raise our kids. Gender plays a huge role. Boys are rougher and tougher. I dont like the idea of boys being raised like girls and girls being raised like boys. we are different. We are suppose to be different. MEANT to be different. so why would we treat them the same? talk to them the same? it doesn't make sense. Boys and girls are put on this earth for different reasons and it is the responsibility of the parents to recognize that and adjust their teaching accordingly. Men should be protective and tough and willing to provide for the family. While women should be nurturing and capable of taking care of the family.

When parents raise their kids the same, they are just asking for them to be a little different when compared to their same-gender friends.

   I guess then its time to talk about what we talked about on Friday. Same sex attraction. I know its a touchy subject and not many people like to talk about it but its something that is becoming more and more prominent in our society. But i think our society is making it more prominent. We are saying if you are a little girly, you must be gay. so Parents tell them, friends tell them, and so they tell themselves they must be gay. So they act upon it. But the truth is, it can be very confusing for them. and it isnt even a feeling of sexual interests. Its merely what intimacy you feel comfortable with. But our society is making it all about sex and everything. Our church just asks us not to act upon it. and i dont think it is that big of a deal. You can be feminine and love the intimacy of hugging as a hello instead of a handshake but it doesnt have to be about sexuality.
 
       It all gets so messy and that is why i just try to avoid it all together. The idea of sexuality within the younger community is unreal to me. our society is all about sex. seriously. its unbelievable. And adding same sex issues into the mix just makes it worse. learning about all this just makes me sad. Im a hopeless romantic. simple and clear love. not messy dirty inappropriate. Boy likes girl, girl likes boy, they fall in love, and live happily ever after. and thats it. nothing messy or confusing about it. and thats how i like it.

Posting with Gratitude

            I think right now, i am just very grateful to be the person that i am today. For being raised in a community that has the same morals that i want to live. For being born in a family where i have been given the gospel. I realize it really can be so hard to decide what is right and wrong. there are so many different directions that seem good. So what is right? well I am glad that i know what is right because i know the gospel is true and the gospel of the Lord does not leave any questions. It gives direct instruction about what we should be doing and how we should be living.

            I feel bad for people who do not have this simple truth, this thing that shows you how to live and this thing that makes living make a little more sense. I mean, i researched some different cultures around the world and i was so shocked about the different cultures around us. There are so many that are good and morally sound. so many that we can learn from and can base our own country after. But then there are the most unusual things such as in the African tribe cultures that literally are unthinkable. Its shocking to see how far off we have become from the truthfulness of a life lived following the Lord.
But that being said, I do appreciate the diversity of our lives.
             Going to BYUI it can be hard to find diversity. I mean lets face it. the majority of us think the same, have the same feelings toward different issues. our backgrounds are not all that diverse either. so i find it all just a little boring. No challenging view points, or creative or colorful backgrounds. I live in california and there are so many people everywhere that believe different things and do different things and i just find it all a little more exciting. so i dont think it is up to us to decide how they live. not our part to judge or look down on a different culture. The Lord sent us down here with the power to choose to live whatever life we want to live. so are we better then He? no. we should not judge or try to throw our own beliefs or cultural morals on others. But we can live as an example of how blessed we can be if we live the way of the Lord.

           I love my family. and i love the efforts that have been taken from my family now and the generations previous to mine that have made it possible for me to live the way i am today. I hope that one day, everyone will be able to live the wonderful gospel filled life that I have been privileged to live.

Week Two.. Different Way of Thinking

So this class is so interesting to me. I love that it is so deep into something that i have been watching my whole life. Families. I have one, my friends have one, all my loved ones have one. I am surrounded by them and yet i have no idea anything about them. But this class is making me think about them in a completely new way. My family has so many different theories and systems for why it is the way it is. we learned about symbolic interaction, conflict, and exchange theory.

There are so many factors that create the life that we know and love so much. My family is the center of everything and to think that i never took the time to think why? what makes my family the rock it is in my life? what would it be like if it was different? i cant help but feel so thankful for the family i have.

We learned all about boundaries between different family members. i loved this idea because it makes so much sense. there is so much things that we dont talk about, that we do talk about, and that we just dodnt know. I love that nothing in my family is rigid. nothing is left without communication or understanding. looking at my family, i feel so blessed to only see the good things in our studies. My family is clear with its boundaries. I have had such a wonderful life and i know it is because of the hard work of my parents. of the gospel in my life. Of the love in my life.

i especially loved the memories that came because of the time i took to think about my siblings and how close we are. I realized how our relationships have changed. and how close i have become with them all. how growing up in such a terrible world, have brought us closer together. has bonded us in our efforts to return to heaven together. to live together forever.

i wouldnt change my family for anything. i love everything about my family. this class is making me miss them, making me wanna go back home and hold them close. i feel so sad for those families that dont feel the love that i do. the struggles that others are battling in a household. i cant imagine. but i love that there are ways of fixing these struggles. its nice to know that even the most horrible hardships, there can still be hope.




my favorite quote of this week was,
"You cant get enough of what you do not need, because what you do not need will never satisfy you."

My family is everything that i need and without them, i dont think i would be the person that i am today.

i love this picture... hahaha my dad was taking it so he wasnt in it. 

i love the idea that my family is an eternal unit and that i can be with them forever. 

Great First week!

         So I think i am really going to like this class. it has been so much fun already. i think something that i think is so cool is there is no busy work. its not a class that makes you do things just for the sake of giving us something to do. the homework that we have is research about the world around us. its about finding trends and finding the affects of the lives we are choosing to live. I really loved when we were learning about the trends that our society is facing. the decline in children, the increase of selfishness. it makes me sad too. because i think about why heavenly Father sent us down here. it was to make it back to him. it was to do what we should to live the gospel and part of living the gospel is raising children in a stable family.
           But when i look around me, or talk to my friends, or watch TV shows, its all about living young for as long as we can. about being whoever we want to be without thinking of anyone else. its about getting a job and being rich and famous, or about sticking it to the man and being a bum your whole life. Girls who want to be moms are looked down on because they are "throwing away" their education. its amazing to look at how many of these trends are going to cause the downfall of our society. Marriages are falling apart, or not happening at all. when i tell people i wont live with someone before i am married, they look at me like im crazy because how can you marry someone if you dont know what it is like to live with them?? the Horror right?
           I mean all the morals that built our amazing nation is falling to the wayside. and to be honest i had no idea the degree and the speed of this decline. until this class. until this week. I think that learning these things are so important because we need to know whats going on. we might be one person, but that one person can tell someone or can show through example and then another person follows, and so it continues. there are so many people in this world. what can one person do? what can i do? but then i think about it, why not try and make a difference?? what is the point of learning all of this, if it isn't going to affect me or the way i am living?
         The learning Model that BYUI is based on, is clear that the education we receive here is not just for a piece of paper saying we finished. it is to make sure that we are changed after we leave this place. that we are educated. that we are smarter, wiser, more Christ like. so that is what i am going to try to become. i am going to learn all that i can in this class. i am going to make sure that the decisions i make and why i make them is loud and clear. so everyone knows that i am not part of the trend. i am not a follower of the world. I am a follower of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and the plan he has for me.

cant wait to start blogging!

So i just wanted to send out a post letting y'all know how excited i am to start blogging! i have never done this before so be patient with me. i am not all that good at it. and i am sure there will be things that are completely wrong on this but i am learning (: i am excited to start this class and to use this blog to put down all my feelings and revelations that i came across while learning more about the families that surround me.